July 21, 2012
Louie Gohmert: Aurora Shootings Result Of ‘Ongoing Attacks On Judeo-Christian Beliefs’ WASHINGTON — Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas) said Friday that the shootings that took place in an Aurora, Colo. movie theater hours earlier were a result of “ongoing attacks on Judeo-Christian beliefs” and questioned why nobody else in the theater had a gun to take down the shooter. During a radio interview on The Heritage Foundation’s “Istook Live!” show, Gohmert was asked why he believes such senseless acts of violence take place. Gohmert responded by talking about the weakening of Christian values in the country. “You know what really gets me, as a Christian, is to see the ongoing attacks on Judeo-Christian beliefs, and then some senseless crazy act of terror like this takes place,” Gohmert said. “Some of us happen to believe that when our founders talked about guarding our virtue and freedom, that that was important,” he said. “Whether it’s John Adams saying our Constitution was made only for moral and religious people … Ben Franklin, only a virtuous people are capable of freedom, as nations become corrupt and vicious they have more need of masters … We have been at war with the very pillars, the very foundation of this country.” Ernest Istook, the host of the show and a former Oklahoma congressman, jumped in to clarify that nobody knows the motivation of the alleged Aurora gunman. Gohmert said that may be true, but suggested the shootings were still “a terrorist act” that could have been avoided if the country placed a higher value on God. “People say … where was God in all of this?” Gohmert said. “We’ve threatened high school graduation participations, if they use God’s name, they’re going to be jailed … I mean that kind of stuff. Where was God? What have we done with God? We don’t want him around. I kind of like his protective hand being present.” Gohmert also said the tragedy could have been lessened if someone else in the movie theater had been carrying a gun and took down the lone shooter. Istook noted that Colorado laws allow people to carry concealed guns. “It does make me wonder, with all those people in the theater, was there nobody that was carrying a gun that could have stopped this guy more quickly?” he asked. Louie Gohmert can go fuck himself.

Louie Gohmert: Aurora Shootings Result Of ‘Ongoing Attacks On Judeo-Christian Beliefs’


WASHINGTON — Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas) said Friday that the shootings that took place in an Aurora, Colo. movie theater hours earlier were a result of “ongoing attacks on Judeo-Christian beliefs” and questioned why nobody else in the theater had a gun to take down the shooter.

During a radio interview on The Heritage Foundation’s “Istook Live!” show, Gohmert was asked why he believes such senseless acts of violence take place. Gohmert responded by talking about the weakening of Christian values in the country.

“You know what really gets me, as a Christian, is to see the ongoing attacks on Judeo-Christian beliefs, and then some senseless crazy act of terror like this takes place,” Gohmert said.

“Some of us happen to believe that when our founders talked about guarding our virtue and freedom, that that was important,” he said. “Whether it’s John Adams saying our Constitution was made only for moral and religious people … Ben Franklin, only a virtuous people are capable of freedom, as nations become corrupt and vicious they have more need of masters … We have been at war with the very pillars, the very foundation of this country.”

Ernest Istook, the host of the show and a former Oklahoma congressman, jumped in to clarify that nobody knows the motivation of the alleged Aurora gunman. Gohmert said that may be true, but suggested the shootings were still “a terrorist act” that could have been avoided if the country placed a higher value on God.

“People say … where was God in all of this?” Gohmert said. “We’ve threatened high school graduation participations, if they use God’s name, they’re going to be jailed … I mean that kind of stuff. Where was God? What have we done with God? We don’t want him around. I kind of like his protective hand being present.”

Gohmert also said the tragedy could have been lessened if someone else in the movie theater had been carrying a gun and took down the lone shooter. Istook noted that Colorado laws allow people to carry concealed guns.

“It does make me wonder, with all those people in the theater, was there nobody that was carrying a gun that could have stopped this guy more quickly?” he asked.

Louie Gohmert can go fuck himself.

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Filed under: America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it 
July 13, 2012
CALIFORNIA WON’T LET IOWA REP. STEVE KING TORTURE CHICKENS, SO NOW HE HATES STATES RIGHTS

The longtime Wonkette reader will know from many perilous exposures to the not-at-all-graphic-and-horrible animal rights ads we carry that chickens in particular are super screwed in this country. So some states, like California, have passed laws saying that starting in 2015, all eggs that come into the state must be from chickens in cages big enough toactually let them stand up. Yay California! Oh sorry, we mean “BOO NAZI SOCIALISM!” Iowa Rep. Steve King was so outraged by this nonsense move that he did something that is not allowed if you are a Republican: he invoked the Commerce Clause, which Republicans hate because it makes hotels rent rooms to black people. Just ask Rand and Ron Paul: freedom means never having to do business with an African American! Steve King must really want to torture those chickens!

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Filed under: Wonkette America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it republicans 
July 9, 2012
Obama is a Piece of Shit: Credit Cards - Obama Admin’s Newest Front in the War on Medical Marijuana

In what could potentially be the newest front in the Obama administration’s multiple front war on medical marijuana, major credit card companies will no longer accept transactions from medical marijuana dispensaries, according to SF Weekly.

Merchant services providers – the intermediaries between retailers and credit card companies who process customers’ payments — began informing their medical marijuana dealing clients that cannabis credit card transactions would not be processed after July 1, according to Stephen DeAngelo, Executive Director of Oakland’s Harborside Health Center.

No government agency is taking credit for making marijuana a cash-only business. But the “factual pattern” is as follows, DeAngelo said: Officials from the Treasury Department flexed on credit card companies, who then informed merchant services providers that they’d be “dropped from Visa and MasterCard forever” unless they stopped processing medical marijuana payments.

We will need to wait to find out the motivations behind this move. It is possible the decision was not related to threats from federal agencies.  But most likely it is the product of the federal government’s continuing efforts to put pressure on finance companies to not work with medical marijuana businesses.  Finance companies almost never decide voluntarily to restrict customers and make less money. Medical marijuana dispensaries have a tough time finding banks and financial service companies to use because of threats from US Deputy Attorney General James M. Cole that doing so could put the banks “in violation of federal money laundering statutes.”

There has, after all, been a pattern of multiple federal agencies all working to restrict, harass and impede state medical marijuana programs since President Obama took office. The IRS is going after Harborside based on an obscure tax provision that would now allow them to qualify for standard business deductions. The ATF is telling medical marijuana patients they can’t buy guns. In some places evennewspapers and radio stations are being threatened by the federal government for taking ads from dispensaries.

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Filed under: Obama is Reagan 2.0 legalize it already America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it 
June 22, 2012
NC SENATE TO VICTIMS OF FORCED STERILIZATION: TOO BAD, SO SAD

Heroes of fiscal discipline in North Carolina have made an astonishing discovery: paying compensation to the victims of a horrible crime does not actually make that crime un-happen in the past! Because of this ironclad law of physics, Republicans in the North Carolina Senate blocked an attempt to compensate surviving victims of the state’s eugenics program — for which compensation the NC House had authorized $10 million — because really, what good would money do to make up for their being forcibly sterilized decades ago? “You just can’t rewrite history. It was a sorry time in this country,” said alleged human being and state Sen.

Between 1929 and 1974, the North Carolina Eugenics Board sterilized about 7600 people to improve humanity; surprisingly, most of them were poor, black, disabled, or institutionalized. (Fun fact! For the program’s first 30 years, twice as many whites as blacks were sterilized. From 1960 to 1969, though, that reversed, almost as if North Carolina were using sterilization as a means of controlling the Negro Problem!) Consider the case of Elaine Riddick, who was 13 when she was raped by a neighbor and became pregnant. The NC Eugenics Board decided that she was “feebleminded” and almost certain to be promiscuous, because why else would a 13 year old go and get herself raped? The Board wrote at the time:

“Because of Elaine’s inability to control herself, and her promiscuity — there are community reports of her ‘running around’ and out late at night unchaperoned — the physician has advised sterilization…This will at least prevent additional children from being born to this child who cannot care for herself, and can never function in any way as a parent.”

Bonus points to anyone who can find a substantial difference between that statement and the asshats who suggest maybe women on welfare should get their tubes tied. (Haha, trick question–there is no difference!)

So after Riddick gave birth to her son Tony in 1968, the state got her illiterate mother to put an “X” on a consent form, and then a doctor cut and cauterized Riddick’s fallopian tubes. She didn’t even know what had been done to her until she was 19. This all was done to an American citizen in the Greatest Country in the World.

In 2010, in one of the few political moves that reflect honor on the state, NC Governor Bev Perdue established the Justice for Sterilization Victims Foundation, which held hearings and collected information on the sterilizations. Its webpage says its mission is “to provide justice and compensate victims who were forcibly sterilized by the State of North Carolina.” Unfortunately, the other thing its website says, as of June 20, is this:

“Due to the joint legislative budget agreement to exclude state funding for compensation for victims of the state’s former Eugenics Board program, as well as continuation funding for operation of the N.C. Justice for Sterilization Victims Foundation, the Foundation has suspended intake of new victim verification requests.”

The Foundation will be shutting down altogether at the end of this month, in a victory for commonsense budgetary discipline, because blowing the people’s tax money on this will not change history, after all. Maybe this logic will lead to the shuttering of any number of shrines to the Confederacy, too.

Still, it’s important to keep in mind the bigger picture, according to serious thinker about history State Sen. Austin Allran (R):

“If you could lay the issue to rest, it might be one thing. But I’m not so sure it would lay the issue at rest because if you start compensating people who have been ‘victimized’ by past history, I don’t know where that would end”

In other words, The Blacks might start getting ideas. [TPM]

[WONKETTE]

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Filed under: wonkette America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it 
May 17, 2012
Half of Our Country is Literally Run by 80s Cartoon Villains

Nearly all Senate Republicans joined their House colleagues in risky territory Wednesday by voting in support of the controversial GOP budget, authored by Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI) — a blueprint for the country’s future that has become a political lightning rod and a defining document for the 2012 elections.

Among its most contentious features, the plan would phase out the existing Medicare program and replace it with a subsidized private insurance system for seniors; dramatically slash Medicaid spending and hand the program over to the states; cut food and nutrition programs for poor people; and allow interest rates on student loans to double; all while dramatically reducing taxes, particularly on wealthy Americans.

[Via TalkingPointsMemo]

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Filed under: America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it expatriating to Sweden ASAP or Canada 
March 15, 2012
Obama: Shitty President

Obama: Shitty President

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Filed under: Obama is Reagan 2.0 America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it 
March 12, 2012
Okie Sen. James Inhofe: No Climate Change Because Bible Told Him So

Best and smartest US Senator by universal acclamation James Inhofe has laideth down some Science on thee during an interview with (who else?) the Voice of Christian Youth America radio show “Crosstalk.” Spaketh Inhofe, while evangelizing his new “book,” The Greatest Hoax: How the Global Warming Conspiracy Threatens Your Future, “Well actually the Genesis 8:22 that I use in there is that ‘as long as the earth remains there will be seed time and harvest, cold and heat, winter and summer, day and night,’ my point is, God’s still up there. The arrogance of people to think that we, human beings, would be able to change what He is doing in the climate is to me outrageous.” In yer face, Science!

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Filed under: wonkette America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it 
November 30, 2011
Running Low On New Wars, Senate Declares U.S. Soil Latest ‘Battlefield’

Good news, everyone! Ever since launching major foreign invasions got a little too expensive and pointless (mostly expensive) even for Congress, and Times Are Tough, our nations’ lawmakers have decided to start “focusing on the domestic issues” like everyone keeps asking them to do, ad nauseum. But since it is impossible for Congress to agree any piece of legislation relating to actual domestic issues like, say, rising poverty, they’ve defaulted back to their only known area of total agreement, “permanent war.” So here’s an idea, what if there were a way to just combine the two? Oooh, the Senate likey: yesterday they passed a bill effectively declaring the United States its own shiny new warzone that would codify the military’s power to hunt on its own soil for anyone — foreign national or American citizen — that they determine meets the vaguely-worded criteria of being “a participant in the course of planning or carrying out an attack or attempted attack against the United States” and ship them off to an internment camp to rot away without trial, forever. Will Bradley Manning finally get some company from his fellow citizens?

There were many, many idiotic defenses of this rancid bill that passed with bipartisan support, but let’s hear from our old standard warmonger neocon jaw-flapping pal Lindsey Graham as he drops yet another pick-up line on longtime crush John McCain, who co-sponsored the bill. Via HuffPo:

“The enemy is all over the world. Here at home. And when people take up arms against the United States and [are] captured within the United States, why should we not be able to use our military and intelligence community to question that person as to what they know about enemy activity?” Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) said.

“They should not be read their Miranda Rights. They should not be given a lawyer,” Graham said.

Opponents of the bill tried in vain to point out that the FBI and Homeland Security already get billions of dollars to stop domestic terrorists instead of more reasonably pointing out that this legislation is completely insane, but since those guys have such a horrible track record of “no successful major terrorist attacks in the U.S. since 9/11,” this obviously calls for the military to use its war powers to indefinitely detain “enemy combatants” (whoever they are, probably everyone who refused to go shopping on Black Friday?) against its own citizens.

Doesn’t that sound, uh, vaguely unconstitutional, sort of? Nah, said the bill’s other sponsor, Democrat Carl Levin of Michigan, in his floor speech:

The Supreme Court said — and I’m going to read these words again – “there is no bar to this nation’s holding one of its own citizens as an enemy combatant.”

Yeah, Levin’s probably right. The 14th-century legal concept of habeus corpus was just getting to be a little too “progressive.” Better stick to the older, more tried-and-true “military rule” concept favored by leaders for helping the restive masses learn to shut the hell up. [NYTimes/HuffPo/Daily Kos]

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Filed under: Wonkette America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it 
November 10, 2011
Thousands of Students Riot Over Firing of Child Rapist’s Protector

Penn State students have taken to the streets of State College, Penn. tonight, taking down lampposts and flipping news satellite trucks. The cops are using mace. More protests against Wall Street greed and income inequality? Nope! It’s because Penn State fired its longtime football coach Joe Paterno for covering up child rape allegedly perpetrated by assistant coach Jerry Sandusky!

Less than an hour after the board of trustees’ decision to fire Paterno made it seem as though sanity and accountability had returned to Penn State, the student body made it very clear that they had not. Within 20 minutes students were outside chanting things like “we want Joe” and “fuck the board”; by midnight eastern time, thousands of students were flooding the streets of State College, some of them acting rather violently—check out that overturned news van!—and all of them earning the enmity of everyone on the internet.

Penn State’s president Graham Spanier, who along with other administrators was also culpable in the coverup, was fired, too, but he’s not the subject of an intense hero-fetish cult, so no one chanted his name. Outside the Paternos’ home, people began to gather. Joe Paterno’s wife Sue thanked the assembled crowd for its “support,” and Joe “[u]rged the students to ‘go study’ and pray for the victims.” (At least this time he didn’t call them “victims, or whatever they want to say.”) Earlier in the evening, he told reporters “Right now, I’m not the football coach, and that’s something I have to get used to.” Yep.

Rumors were floating around about another, larger gathering on campus—a candlelight vigil for Sandusky’s victims—but they don’t seem to have panned out. Penn State’s student paper the Daily Collegian is at the scene and is reporting from its Twitter accounts at @PSUFootblog and@DailyCollegian.

(Source: Gawker)

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Filed under: America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it Football fetishism 
October 27, 2011
New Bipartisan Bill Will Allow U.S. Gov’t To Shut Off Any Website, Anywhere, For Any Reason

You know how the politicians are always saying we need to be competitive with China? Well, we are about to get super competitive when it comes to internal censorship of the global Internet.Everybody except for a handful of malcontent “privacy activists” is behind the bold new plan to make all Internet service providers in the United States turn off any domainwithin five days, if Washington says “turn it off.” As usual, this new legislation is cloaked in bullshit terminology about copyright and lost profits for media conglomerates, but the result is exactly the same as China’s “great firewall” — except, this being the land of “corporations are people, my friends,” the ISPs will be responsible for the dirty work instead of some top-level government technological agency. 

Via Cryptogon, here’s the relevant chunk of the legislation:

A service provider shall take technically feasible and reasonable measures designed to prevent access by its subscribers located within the United States to the foreign infringing site (or portion thereof) that is subject to the order, including measures designed to prevent the domain name of the foreign infringing site (or portion thereof) from resolving to that domain name’s Internet Protocol address. Such actions shall be taken as expeditiously as possible, but in any case within 5 days after being served with a copy of the order, or within such time as the court may order.

How? The whole Internet domain system requires a constantly updated Domain Name Server database that connects your computer to whatever server holds your “Tranny Hunter” porn or Communist Revolution/Buffy slash-fiction forum. Your ISP might be Verizon or AT&T for your “smart phone” or it might be dial-up AOL for confused old people who still have $9.95 a month charged to their Discover card. Either way, the ISP “resolves” the domain name you’re trying to reach with the computer servers that have that content, wherever it might be. (All you actual tech people in the comments can correct this if necessary.) So when the Government sends a “turn off these domains” order to your ISP, the ISP will have no choice but to block the offending websites. Problem solved! You know they’ve been working on this feverishly since the WikiLeaks outrage, right?

Here’s a Forbes blog post that explains just how the law will be used:

The PROTECT IP Act would allow copyright owners – movie studios and other content providers – simply to accuse a website of infringement, which could lead to that site being shut down by court order and entire links to the site being wiped clean from the Internet. Any website with a hyperlink, such as Twitter, Facebook or a blog, would be subject to liability. More, non-infringing sites could be inadvertently shut down under the proposal. Indeed, the law is so far-reaching that it would force Internet providers like Comcast to block all access to the allegedly illegal site.

The potential for abuse by the notoriously litigious content industry is clear. Last year, when the government sought to shut down one child pornography site, it ended up affecting some 70,000 legitimate sites for several days, even notifying visitors that the sites – many of which were business sites – were purveyors of child pornography.

For instance, the bill is so broadly written that, in theory, it would allow any copyright owner to shut down a legitimate retail website, such as Amazon or Best Buy, by alleging that one product being sold on the site could “enable or facilitate” an infringement.

But in practice, it won’t be giant business websites like Amazon that get the plug pulled. It will be the little guys, the alternative press, the OccupyWhatever sites, anything that gets in the way of the Internet’s actual role in America: retail advertising and shoe shopping and lonely online pursuits shown to lower people’s actual engagement with the world, like sport teams or pornography or gadget blogs or orc-battle games or anything shit out by the Murdoch empire of diversions.

Oh well. It was really an aberration that the Internet functioned as openly as it has these past two decades. But that era is already over, as proven by the U.K. national police shutting down mobile messaging during the summer riots or, just two months ago, San Francisco’s BART stations easily turning off all the cell phone signals within the stations to prevent protesters from organizing an action there against police brutality. [Cryptogon/Forbes/Reuters]

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Filed under: America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it Wonkette Internet Freedom of Information 
October 19, 2011
"Socialism never took root in America because the poor see themselves not as an exploited proletariat but as temporarily embarrassed millionaires."

— John Steinbeck

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Filed under: America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it 
October 18, 2011
Americans Becoming Too Sick And Fat To Work Anymore

Another big score for “the best health care system in the world,” hooray: a new study by Gallup shows that 86% of full-time employed Americans are missing 450 million days at work due to being either obese or having chronic health problems or both, which doesn’t even count days workers feel ill and don’t take time off. The furious little number crunchers announced that this also means $153 billion a year in “lost productivity” so that business people will take notice and stop hiring fat and sick people, but the joke is on them since it is now basically everybody. Hope America is having fun spending those 13 days of vacation a year they get feeling like shit! 

Oh come on, isn’t at least another fading obesity-racked empire suffering worse problems, maybe… uh, Britain, with all their socialist deathcare panels and socialism? Not really, according to Gallup:

The $153 billion in annual lost productivity costs linked to unhealthy workers in the United States is more than four times the cost found in the United Kingdom. The striking difference is the result of fewer unhealthy workers in the U.K. About 14% of full-time U.S. workers are of a normal weight and have no chronic illness, compared with 20% in the U.K.

The high percentages of full-time U.S. workers who have less than ideal health are a significant drain on productivity for U.S. businesses. However, employees and employers have the opportunity to potentially increase productivity if they address the health issues that are currently plaguing the workplace.

Nah, then America would have to start calling itself Canada or something. [Gallup]

(Source: wonkette.com)

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Filed under: Wonkette American exceptionalism: exceptionally terrible America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it 
October 16, 2011
"Make a list… Call them and ask them, ‘Are you going to vote on Issue 2 and are you going to vote for it?’ If they say no, well, you just make sure that they don’t go vote. Let the air out of their tires on election day. Tell them the election has been moved to a different date. That’s up to you how you creatively get the job done."

—

Mike Huckabee, encouraging voter suppression this Friday in Mason, Ohio.

He was speaking in support of Issue 2. Issue 2 is the ballot referendum on Senate Bill 5, the bill in Ohio that stripped collective bargaining rights. Enough signatures were gathered to put SB 5 on the ballot as Issue 2.

A ‘yes’ vote means the voter supports SB 5 and Issue 2. A ‘no’ vote means the voter does not support SB 5 and Issue 2. So if you don’t support it, and you’re the relative of someone who does, Mike Huckabee thinks said relative should keep you from voting. 

Thought experiment: What if a Democrat said this? What if Howard Dean said this at a fundraiser? Fox News would have a collective aneurysm. Instead, Huckabee’s comments are defended as “just a joke” online. Gotcha.

(via cognitivedissonance)

(Source: masonbuzz.com, via cognitivedissonance)

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Filed under: America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it 
October 8, 2011

Fischer made a passionate case against the imposition of Sharia law in the United States, called homosexuality, among other things, a “threat to public health,” insisted that Muslims and Christians don’t worship the same God and argued that there had not been a major terrorist attack on American soil because crowds at Major League Baseball games often sing “God Bless America” during the seventh inning stretch. “Major League Baseball has converted our stadiums into cathedrals,” he said.


(Source: The Huffington Post)

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Filed under: America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it 
October 4, 2011
California’s Gazillion Prisoners Also Rioting

California, “the industrial prison state,” has a tremendous number of people locked up in state, county and privately-operated hellholes, the only growth industry in the doomed state. And the prisoners are rioting, statewide. Tens of thousands of them, rioting against their low-paid peers in security guard outfits, rioting against starvation diets of inedible swill and decades of “solitary confinement” and overcrowding and misery. Why, if they ever figure out that they can easily overpower all those donut-belly guards and lose maybe 10% of the escapees to the police state’s machine guns in the resulting mass breakout, things could get weird:

Here, from a mysterious website called TUCONE, is the news about the rioting:

Thousands of inmates at up to eight Californian prisons have been on hunger strike for over a week in protest at what they feel is unfair treatment at the hands of prison authorities. Estimates suggest that there could be up to 12,000 inmates involved in the coordinated protest across the state, according to a prison advocacy group.

[…]

The prisoners have made five demands to authorities, including a change to current prison policy where an inmate is forced to go through an interrogation process where they are forced to incriminate themselves and other inmates in order to secure their release from solitary confinement. In addition, the prisoners want authorities to end group lockdowns and for those in solitary confinement to be fed better quality meals and access to clothing more suited to the winter.

California spends $47,000 per inmate, per year. That’s to keep its share of America’s 2.3 million prisoners locked up, mostly for being poor people stealing shit to buy dope. Honestly, that’s what everyone is in prison for, that’s what makes America the world’s biggest police state (according to U.S. Department of Justice figures). Only 8% of American prisoners are in jail for “violent crime.” The rest are locked up for drunken idiocy, drug addiction and chicken-shit property crime, mostly to fund drug habits to numb the grinding bullshit of life for America’s mostly struggling population.

Anyway, riots! Shares in privately operated prison franchises are expected to either go up a little or down a little based on how many low-wage prison guards are killed in the revolt. [TUCONE]

(Source: wonkette.com)

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Filed under: Wonkette prison state America is terrible also it sucks and I hate it 
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